This is definitely not what I consider a fun experience.

To all the mom's who rave about the beauty and joy of pregnancy, I curse you. It has thus far been a bit of a miserable experience for me. The first trimester I felt hung over every day and also suffered severe hip pain and sciatic nerve tingling. Oh and let's not forget to mention the extreme tiredness. I would have to go out to my car at lunch time to take a nap in order to function for the rest of the working day. And just when I think all that misery is over in the second trimester it gets even better. Aside from the weight gain, dimples in my butt, chaffing on my inner thighs, random dark hairs on my stomach, and uncontrollable gas, now my damn back has started screaming at me. It's not the typical lower back pain but pain right at my bra line and mostly on my left side. It feels like my back is contracting and about ready to give birth. (Speaking of birth...I thought I had a high threshold for pain and could maybe do natural birth but have since decided that I am a wimp and it wouldn't be physically possible or a mentally sound decision. I am getting the drugs!) I was just told that my problem is simple...I need a new bra. I have been trying to force these suckers into my usual C cup and they are most likely D's so I just need to go make the purchase. I know I should not complain and feel blessed that I get to experience this but I just had no idea it could be so tough. And considering I am only 22 weeks along I am really hoping and praying that my body eventually settles and all this madness ends. Wishful thinking.

I farted on the massage table!

Let's just say I have always felt that I have had chronic gas. Not sure if it is an actual medical condition but it should be. My mom has actually purchased me bottles of Bean-O because it has become a family joke. “Bean-O now and there will BE NO gas later.” Now that I am pregnant the gas is even worse which Trevor really doesn't appreciate. He seems to think it makes me less lady-like but what do I care?? I am carrying his child so the least he can do is deal with a little noise and a little smell here and there. Anyway, for the last 5 weeks I have been getting weekly prenatal massages because I decided that I should be pampered through this whole 40 week process. It's the one night a week I look forward to most especially after a long day at work. And last night as I was enjoying my hour massage I farted on the table. Let's just say it wasn't silent and I had zero control of this air flow. I pretended as if nothing happened and so did my lovely prenatal masseuse. She's the momma of two baby girls so I think she understands right? I can't help that she puts me into such a relaxed state that I lose all control. I just hope I don't lose control of my bladder or bowels in the weeks to come. Yikes!

What is the deal with pregnancy dreams??

You would not believe the dreams I have been having. They pretty much started when I got pregnant and continue to get more vivid each night. Some are good, some are scary, some make me want to cry the next day, and some make me wake up and think I just had an orgasm in my sleep (TMI). I think I was a bit stressed out early in my pregnancy because I kept having dreams about the doctor's not being able to find the heartbeat when they ran that little monitor across my tummy. I had one of those dreams last night and can't stop thinking about it today. I don't feel stressed anymore so why I am still having that dream? The sex dreams are out of control. And get this...I have even had a few lesbian dreams. I am not joking! So what does that mean?? Am I really supposed to be a lesbian? Trevor likes to give me a high five in the morning if I have had a lesbian dream. Here's to a good night of dreaming about flowers and clouds.

It's a Boy!

I have always dreamed of having a boy as my first born. Growing up with older brother's I always felt protected and wanted the same for when I hopefully have a little girl. And as it turns out my dreams came true! This was our second ultrasound and it was absolutely the coolest thing I have ever experienced. But first let's talk about my fear before going into this appointment. What if our kid is a hermaphrodite? Yes, this (among many other stupid things) is the crap I have thought of while being pregnant. But alas, we are not having a hermaphrodite. We got to see the chambers of the heart, the spine, the brain, the face, and most importantly...the little penis. We are so excited.